someone please explain insurance to me. they are dumb.

I needed one refill on my heart burn meds...a 30 day supply.

Insurance will only cover a 90 day supply. huh?

I don't need a 90 day supply, I need a 30 day supply...heck, hopefully I only need two more weeks worth ;-)

So tomorrow my doc has to call my insurance and then my pharmacy and arrange a 90 day supply for me. Wouldn't it make more sense for them to arrange to only cover a 30 day supply instead of a 90 since I won't be using all of them...but heck, if insurance wants to pay for 90 days of pills instead of 30 then I guess that is their choice to pay 3x the amount...my copay stays the same. sheesh!

in other news, I attempted sleeping on my couch last night in hopes of getting some less painful sleep...mission accomplished on the minimal pain but the rest itself wasn't so restful. oh well. it was worth a try.

in yet other news, my inlaws are visiting. my MIL has sewn and sewn and sewn and the nursery is filled with wonderful window treatments and cushions and a diaper stacker and gosh...she sewed a ton of great stuff. Plus we went to Joann Fabric today and she's going to make some sheets for the pack'n play and some other cute stuff too. Such a blessing.

in yet other other news...nope, that's all I got. I'm tired. I am watching Dancing with the Stars and I'm ready for bed...I may attempt a bath...getting out isn't always easy but it feels so nice :)

say hi folks, tell me what's up with you...I'm getting a little tired of only thinking about having a baby these days...I need a distraction...got any good jokes? stories? do tell!

3 weeks

Well pleaseth me the sweet time of Easter
That maketh the leaf and the flower come out. ~Bertran de Born

(and maybe a baby?! lol)



I am three weeks from my due date. I read a great article today about how important the last few weeks are for baby developing, it gave me a little more patience for the big event...impatience was starting to take over.

3 weeks will go by quickly I hope :)

Estrogen Island

It was a girls weekend. Heidi and Kristen came from NC. Ashley and Evie came from St.Louis. Jessi, Brandi and I were here already...Lance was at work :)

The baby shower was so nice. I knew it would be because my darling sister in law, Ashley, was in charge...and she knows how to throw a great party :)

We also had a chance to enjoy pedicures and donuts and ice cream and other girly fun :)

Oh the joys!

Ashley blogged about the fabulous weekend too...check out her blog for some more cute pics and a fun recap.

good news for a change

the doc called and my blood tests are all normal.  so no pre e.  yay!  

my next doc appt is next friday so I'll have a chance to talk to my doctor more about it at that point but for now I am not worried which is great.  yay!

today was fun, we did a little de-cluttering around the house and decorating stuff.  I like it.  yay!

time to go do a little house cleaning...all the girls come tomorrow for a weekend visit so want things freshy fresh.  yay!

My thankful blog

I have posted some pretty complaining blogs recently and promised I'd post a thankful one to balance it out :)  here I go.

Things I am thankful for...

I have wonderful doctors.  I have been beyond impressed with the care I have received.  I do not worry for a second that they are missing something or ignoring something that might be important and everyone is so nice.  Plus since I've had sooo much stuff going on this whole pregnancy they really know me.  I don't even have to sign in when I get to the office, the girls who work the desk just say "Hi Mrs. Lockhart, we got you." and smile.  lol.  a perk of all this I guess.

I have a wonderful husband.  It hasn't been all roses, we are both human and this hasn't been an easy road to be on...but to have a husband who is as understanding as he is, especially considering how many issues I have had and for him to provide for us so I haven't had to work. Well, he is pretty much my hero.  

I have been amazed at how many people have sent me/baby gifts in the mail, the people who have blessed me at baby showers, all the wonderful comments on my blog and on my facebook...I feel loved and cared about for sure.

I have great skin.  Lol.  If you have ever struggled with acne or pimples then you will totally understand how great it has been to not have any skin issues this whole pregnancy...granted I have a perma rash on my forehead from the hormones but otherwise nothing.  I am very happy about that.  It has been a nice change.

I am so thankful I had the freedom to decorate my baby nursery just how I wanted.  It was so much fun, my favorite part of this pregnancy actually.  It makes me happy just to walk into it.

I am beyond thankful for my family.  Jessi helping me so much, my mom being on the other end of the phone when I've needed to talk, my dad's sweet care about the baby and me, Ira and Ash being so supportive and excited for us, Mike and Jess going through the same things we are and having a shower with Jess, my gram calling and checking on me,  lance's parents being so excited and his mom sewing so many things for us, his sister and family being excited for us and planning a visit.  So much to be thankful for on that front.  

I'm sure there are other things I could write about that I'm thankful for but those are my biggies.  

So I might have preeclampsia.  Don't know a lot about it and don't really want to google because I don't want to worry until I know for sure.  What I do know, swelling, headache, high blood pressure and protein in your urine are the indicators.  I have all of those...although my BP isn't super high, just high for me.  They took blood labs yesterday to find out for sure.  Still waiting to hear from the doc about those.  

From reading the message boards I know that if you have Pre E sometimes you get put on bed rest and sometimes they induce you early because it can be dangerous for you and for baby. Other than that I don't know much.  

So that's my latest and greatest.  They gave me some good drugs for my headache which I am very happy about...5 days of headache pain with no relief was getting old fast.  yay for drugs :)  

The nursery

It sometimes happens, even in the best of families, that a baby is born.  This is not necessarily cause for alarm.  The important thing is to keep your wits about you and borrow some money.  ~Elinor Goulding Smith

Love and pregnancy and riding on a camel cannot be hid.  ~Arabic Proverb

By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.  ~Phyllis Diller

I feel like I'm getting way bigger.  I should take another picture and compare I suppose.  It's good the baby is growing.

Lance and I headed out for some shopping yesterday, I really want to find the sweetest first baby outfit for bringing this guy home from the hospital.  Something that I will keep and will remind me how little he once was.  I know how quick babies grow!  

I've had this wonderful headache for going on 4 days now.  Not sure what to do other than take a little tylenol here and there to take the edge off.  Not sure if it's related to the iron treatments or lack of sleep or if I slept funny and hurt my neck somehow...any way you slice it I am getting tired of it.  I did have my last iron treatment yesterday.  The nurse said it would take a couple weeks for me to tell a difference, I am hoping I have more energy.  I am tired of feeling useless and worn out when I barely do much at all.  

I'm looking forward to this weekend when my SIL comes to visit and so do my NC girls.  We're having a baby shower :)  Guaranteed fun.  

Well the Iron treatments I have been on have left me fatigued and feeling sick.  You think I'd be used to it by now.  I have one more treatment on Monday.  

The nurse who put my IV in this last time was sweet to talk to, she said that when she first started working at this office she was shocked at how many pregnant women came in for cancer treatments...not realizing we are all there for Iron treatments.  She had to laugh at herself when she realized she'd been feeling bad for people who didn't actually have cancer.  

And as I sit there and have Iron drip into my veins and look around the room at the many others who have no hair and look like they are barely alive...I feel blessed.  Yes this pregnancy has taken it's toll but there is a happy ending in store for me.  Some of the people at that office may get their happy ending too but it isn't as sure of a thing as mine.  

Here I am...I think the iron looks like coffee.  I know a few people who would sign up for a coffee drip into their veins :)  

Health Update for those who are interested...

I get to go to the blood doctor office for three days and get IV iron treatments.  yeehaw. Starting today.  I'm anemic.  Hopefully this will help.  

Baby is in the -1 position and I am not dilated.  I go to the doc once a week now.  There is a good chance I will go early or be on time according to the doc.  I am prepared mentally for it to happen late...anything else is bonus.

I haven't throw up for 6 days.  Happy about that.

I am uncomfortable in general but I think just at a normal level for pregnant women.  My knee still hurts but it's not nearly as bad as when I first hurt it.  The whole ligament loosening thing that happens to your body while preparing to give birth contributed to the incident.

I still have pretty horrid heart burn but I take lots of pills and tums and try to be smart about what I eat, when I eat and sitting up afterwards for a while.  It's not unbearable at the moment which I am thankful for.

I think that's it.  Not totally looking forward to the whole IV thing but my sis is going with me today and she can keep me entertained while it's happening.  I am more worried about if it will upset my system and cause me to be sick than the actual IV process...but it's supposed to make things better so I hope that is true.  we will see!

And now I have to go pee.  because that is all I do anymore.  :)  

Something darling

I could never fit into this in a million years...even not pregnant...but if I won it I'd give it to my darling sister in law and enjoy her joy.  

Grosgrain: Paper Crane Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

So I had food poisoning this week and now I've managed to hurt my knee in such a manner that I am limping and in a lot of pain.  

I texted the person in charge of volunteers this morning and told her I couldn't be there to teach my class and she replied and said she had marked me for being gone this week anyhow for some reason so she already had it covered.

Which leads me to believe that God somehow knew I was going to be too sick and in pain to go to church today.  WHAT IS UP WITH THAT?!  seriously God...what are you thinking?  I am waiting for an answer mister!

I don't like to use my blog as a spot to complain...normally.

But today I have a list of complaints...

WHY oh WHY must I continue puking?! 

Everything inside of me HURTS.  

Baby kicking is cute in theory but in practice is extremely uncomfortable and makes me yelp.

I walk by mirrors and see my face and cringe at how my weight gain has effected my already naturally baby looking chubby face. I don't feel horrible about my weight gain elsewhere, but my face?!  ug.

I want to wear my wedding ring so bad and can't.  I feel naked with out it.

Sleep used to make me feel better but now it's a chore.

I can get virtually nothing done when I feel like crap and I can see what needs to be done staring me in the face...and it's not like me not doing stuff only effects me...I have a house of people to consider.  

I remember when having a day to lay around and watch TV was a luxury...now it is all I can do on certain days and feels like some kind of torture.

I want so badly to put on a pair of jeans that fit and a cute t-shirt and my tennies...

okay.  I think I'm done.  

I'll try to counter this post in the near future with a thankful blog...but not today!

I feel silly.  

I am still so new here and trying to start to get to know people...the whole puking for 4 months straight really stunted that process.  It's been getting a lot better but still a slow process when you only see people occasionally.  

My fabulous sister in law is having a baby shower for me here in Nashville on March 21st and a couple of my NC girlfriends are also going to visit for it...my sister will be here and Brandi...so a nice group to start with...

but the part where I feel silly is...inviting people from Nashville that I barely know.  Some of the people I "know" I don't even know their last names.  I have been figuring them out via facebook (thank heaven for social networking) but I still feel silly.  I don't know... insecurities cropping up I guess.  Why would they want to come, just because I kind of feel like I know them they might not really feel the same, them reading the invitation and not remembering who I am...yeah...these are the things I am trying to not think about as I just email them all and ask for mailing addresses so I can invite them.  If not one single person shows up I would completely understand because I am still such a new face.  

I am glad that I at least have my for sure group of ladies...the memory of the event at such an important time of my life is what I will cherish...no matter how it all turns out.  

I am glad that Lance and I get along so well.  He is my husband and my friend.  I am not the most fun person to be around...all huge and hurting and winey and unfocused...and yet he still likes to be around me and I haven't gotten sick of him either.  It's nice.  

We drove around today and just looked at houses and enjoyed having the windows down.  It was nice.  Not my own personal best day...but a nice day for us in spite of it.  

showered

My mom and a couple of our friends (Peggy and Suzanne) hosted a baby shower for myself and my sister in law in Wisconsin a couple weekends ago. It was so nice. Lots of baby cuteness and good times.

My mom and sister working on the food table.  Peggy cooked it all up...amazing!




My sister in law, Jessica, and my neice, Eliana.  They are expecting a boy too!



One of my all time favorite treats.  Wonderful!





Frequent Crier...so clever :)



The girls...that's my mom in the middle...isn't she pretty?

And our baby shower bouncer, my bro Mike :)